Hey there. And welcome back to another episode of the profitable mindset podcast.
Welcome to the profitable mindset. A show dedicated to teaching you the skills you need to build a profitable product based business that makes you feel free and fully and control. Here’s your host, Charlotte Smith
Guys, welcome to episode number 37. The two biggest reasons businesses fail. Now this episode is the first in a new series. I’m going to run the summer all about starting and running your business, and really it’s for business owners, no matter what level you’re at, whether you’re brand new and just starting out, or maybe you’ve been at it for years and you want to become more sustainable or profitable, or you want to expand and grow. So this, this series will help all of you. And I’m really excited to share this because I just want to help every way I can assure that you’re doing all you can to stay in business, which of course means you got to make some money because you’ve probably heard me quote, the USDA statistics that 80% of all farm businesses are done for and throw in the towel by year two and 98% are out of business by year five.
Now those stats, interestingly enough, are aligned with all small business failure rates, stats. So no matter what business you start, there is a sense of urgency for you to find out what you need to do to make sure you stay in business. You know, so let’s keep you in business for the long run. How can you be sustainable and profitable? So you’re around two years from now, five years from now, 10 years from now, because when you start a business and then you close it up, you lose a lot of money too. So let’s not do that. Let’s try to avoid that. Okay? So the two big reasons businesses go under is number one, they don’t have the formula for running a business properly, which I help you with daily, whether it’s in my podcast or in my classes with all the students or in my emails, even in my groups. Okay? So we’re talking business strategy everywhere. And number two, they don’t know how to manage their mind because business management is mind management. Okay? So your business will only be successful to the extent that you’ve got your thoughts, your emotions, your actions, your beliefs, your behaviors, all completely aligned and working in your favor. You can use willpower at first. It might get you through the first couple of years, but if you don’t get everything aligned, you will yourself not bankrupt yourself. Okay? And your bank account. So you will need to develop a
Exquisite mind management
To build longterm success, which includes profitability, sustainability, and you gotta feel good doing it. A lot of people go out of business just because it’s an unsustainable lifestyle they’ve created for themselves. It’s too stressful. So mind management is the key here, and you can build a business. Like I said, out of willpower, that makes some money, but you don’t learn how to manage your mind longterm. You will only stay at that level or it will be miserable, or you could end up making yourself sick. So if you don’t work on your mindset, I just have so much evidence over the last decade. That that is a quick ticket to going under. Okay? So stay tuned. If you want to know that formula for running a business properly, you don’t want to miss any of these upcoming episodes this summer. Now to start, you gotta know if you don’t already that running a business is hard, work mentally. And guess what? Your brain is not wired to like hard work. It’s actually wired the way our brains are wired. Tell you to avoid hard work. So
Moment you think building
Your business, whatever it is you’re working on might be too hard. You’ll want to quit. And then if you look around you, you will find so much evidence. You should quit. So this is where I it’s. It’s easier to go out of business than to stay in business. You just got to know that. So it’s really important for you to understand that your brain is wired to give up when things get difficult or challenging. Isn’t that crazy? It explains a lot. Doesn’t it? So just know that it is normal,
That you feel like giving up half the time. It’s not because
It’s not going to work out. Or you went down the wrong path and you need to find an easier path. I can tell you this. There is no easier path starting a business. And since then, this is what your brain is wired to tell you to do in order to start and run a business, you gotta be able to manage that part of your brain. That’s telling you to go out of business. You got to manage your thinking so that you’re not giving in to that part of your brain. That’s constantly saying, dang, give up, just quit. It’s too hard. And I know without a doubt, because I’ve been in bed business for decades for myself. And because of all the people I’ve worked with in this area, the only reason I’m still here this many years and even decades later running a business is only because I didn’t give up when it got hard, that’s it.
I was not any smarter than anyone else. I wasn’t born into money. I didn’t inherit money or land. I don’t have amazing connections. I don’t know fancy people or anything that can give me a leg up or open a door. It is only because I didn’t give up when things got hard that I’m still here this many years later. And did I want to give up? Heck yeah. That’s what I’m telling you here. Your brain is telling you to quit and give up when things get hard, just because that’s how your brain is set up. And also notice if you find yourself looking around and saying, Oh, well that person’s still in business because they live in a better location. Or because that person over there inherited land or money, or they’re still in business because they know the right people, or maybe they got on the front page of the newspaper.
That’s why they were able to be successful. If you find yourself looking around and telling yourself those things, you’re then telling yourself a story that will actually make it easy for you to quit. Then, then it’s really easy for you to give up and quit. If you think someone else has something that you, you don’t and then even find yourself, justifying it to others, like, Oh, I didn’t have the money that that person had. I didn’t have the connections and I didn’t have doors open for me like that person over there. So that’s why I had to quit. But please no creating and building a successful business is not about anything outside of you that someone else might have, but you don’t. And in my decade of consulting and coaching busy women, running businesses, the same failure rate applies to those of us or not us because I’m not in that crowd.
Those who come into this business with a lot of money or those who don’t have any money, same failure rate, and those people who have great connections or live in the right location. And those who live in a so called worst location, or don’t have any connections. The failure rate of their businesses is still the same. And the actually what I’ve noticed is money can sometimes be deceptive and prohibitive to your success. I will see people who come, who start a business. And since they have a lot of money to start with, or they’re pumping a lot of money in from their day job, they continue not learning these things. I’m teaching you here today because they feel this false sense of security of success because they aren’t struggling financially. So without the sense of urgency, to figure out the skills I’m teaching you here on this episode today, they just give up blaming something else for their failure.
Not realizing it was 100% within their control. If they’d learned how to manage their minds. So having money or connections might make some things easier upfront. But if the people doing this, don’t learn how to manage their minds, which most people you don’t otherwise the failure rate wouldn’t be so high. And also because it’s something we’re not taught in school, then what you will find is they will end up going out of business. So there’s only one way to prevent it. That, and that is to learn how to think successfully and how to manage the part of your brain that is wired to tell you to quit when things get hard, because it will. All right. So just know that there’s nothing outside of you that will make you succeed in business. And if you’re thinking, is that right? Oh, this should be easier. Or there’s something I’m missing or there’s something someone else has it.
I don’t have like maybe the right marketing plan or business plan or just the right consultant. Then that’s making you think you’ll struggle. But I’m telling you, if you want to seed everything you have and need to succeed is in your, our mind, that’s it. You got to learn to manage your mind. This is my life’s work. And I love it so much. I love watching my clients lives, change immensely when they learn to intentionally create the life and business they want finally. And like I said, there’s nowhere in school or in our education system. You learn this. So you find yourself as an adult wondering why things aren’t working out for you. Well, it’s time you got to learn these lessons. You’re going to have to look outside of our educational systems, traditional systems to learn these things. It’s why I do what I do.
And here, it’s what I know from decades of running my own business while having a family and a life. It is hard. It’s the biggest challenge I’ve ever done. And I wasn’t born knowing how to do this. None of us are. And in years past I did run myself into the ground. I did exhaust myself. I was so stressed, full of doubt, frustration. I thought about quitting. I thought that was the only way out. I thought there was no hope for a better life. So I knew I had to get help. Yeah. And I knew I had to figure out how to manage that constant, looping of negative thoughts, stressful thoughts, anxiety, or doubt. I remember thinking is this all there is I wake up, I sit in doubt and anxiety and stress all day long, and then I go to bed and then I wake up and do it again the next day.
So what I figured out though, and this was probably, I believe about five or six years ago is if I wanted to live the life I was committed to, I could see little glimpses of a fulfilling life. And I knew this was the challenge I had to take on learning. If I wanted to embrace that fulfilling life, I knew I could. I figured it all out and really live it. You know, things like, why did we have this beautiful property out in the country? If we weren’t able to enjoy it because we were just working long, long hours. You know, we weren’t sitting out in the garden on the back deck, enjoying dinner. We were grabbing something on the run so we could get back to work. And I knew that I needed to figure something out before I made myself sick or before I threw in the towel.
I really, so anyway, I didn’t change anything about my business, except my thinking. The first thing I learned in managing my brain is that our brain is wired to see the negative. So no wonder, all I saw were the problems in my business and in our life and in myself. All right. Therefore, since I was able to learn this and get some training in this, let me help you. First of all, you got to know you don’t change your brain overnight because again, it’s wired this way and you’ve spent a lifetime practicing the way you think till now. So it’s work that takes time. But when you take the time to do it, you’ll start living a super sustainable life. You’ll get to where you love waking up every day, you learn to love challenges. And for me, challenges, especially those when they’re really huge problems, or I have a lot of challenges right in a row, like I think why is this happening to me day after day, it no longer makes me think I should give up or that something’s gone wrong.
Now I’ve come to realize every day, without a doubt, that challenges and hard things mean that everything’s working exactly as it is supposed to. So when I learned to manage my mind and expect difficult things and to even welcome difficult things like even welcome, big, hard, tragic things in my business. When I learned to respond with thoughts like, Oh, of course this is happening to me because I’ve chosen to create a business. When I learned to think of it that way, like this is happening and I need to run toward it and embrace it. Then what happens is the marketing strategy I teach or the business planning I teach or the time management strategies I teach all start to work with great ease and you have great success. Okay? They work when you manage your thinking and they don’t work when you don’t think they’ll work.
So you can learn those how tos all day long. But if you don’t learn how to manage your thinking around it, you won’t have success. I’m going to show you how to do this. All right. The difference between those who have sustainable lives, profitable businesses, successful businesses is not that they have it easier. It’s because they’ve learned how to manage their mind around all the huge challenges that will come up even daily. So let me jump into the first part here about brain management. What I love about running my own business of course is the freedom I get, but I really do love this light. That is super demanding of me mentally. Once I learned how to manage those, the demanding life, then I’ve learned to actually love it. And I hope you’ll get to that place to where you can love the challenge of knowing that you can create a bit more success in your life.
If you become more disciplined and more focused, and you’ll learn, like I know without a doubt that if I want a better life, I’ve got to embrace those difficult things. And now, today I love that challenge. And it wasn’t always that way. Before I learned that I had to learn how to manage my brain. Cause I would look at challenges as thinking something’s gone wrong. I’ve done the wrong thing. I’m going down the wrong path. I don’t look at it that way. Now I’ve learned that I have to welcome those challenges. So creating a business, a life that’s sustainable for you and your family, totally dependent on how you manage your brain. First up, you’re gonna want to learn how you are motivated mentally and emotionally. I hear from a lot of my students who at first say, uh, they don’t feel motivated to do certain things.
They know they should be doing in their days. They know that maybe they should be spending more time on the things that are actually bringing in money in their business, like meeting people or marketing or reaching out to people. But they tell me they don’t feel motivated to do those things because sometimes because there’s so many things, right? So then they get distracted. They find them selves just going into Facebook groups or being on social media or scrolling on their phone, distracting themselves. And they report to me that they just don’t feel motivated to go out and do the things to find the new customers or take the steps to raise their prices. So they don’t do it because they don’t feel motivated. Or maybe they tell me they’re faced with an opportunity that they don’t follow up on because they don’t feel motivated. Something stands in their way.
What I want to tell you though, is that you actually have complete control over feeling motivated. It’s not something that happens to you. It’s not something you wait for. You got to learn how to create motivation. Yes, you have control over it. So learning how your brain is motivated means can finally stop fighting against the desire to be motivated. Even though you don’t know how, and you’ll be able to move to a place of finally knowing without a doubt, how to create motivation on the spot when you want it, when you need it, it’s not easy. It’s hard, but it’s definitely worth it. And it’s hard because you’re retraining your brain to think in a different way. You will learn to be able to move to a place of finding it very natural and very automatic to create motivation inside of you consistently sweat. You’re going to need to do to build this a sustainable business.
So here’s, what’s going on in your brain. Our brains are wired to behave a certain way in our world. And you knowing how your brain is wired is so eye opening, it’ll shed some light on why you haven’t felt motivated in the past or why it might be a struggle for you. The part of our brain that’s wired for survival is wired to do just three things to assure we stay alive and it’s in charge of doing these three things all day long. That’s its only job. This is the part of our brain. The amygdala. It is constantly sending you messages to number one, seek pleasure. Number two, avoid pain and number three, preserve your energy or to put it in another way that might make it easier to understand. This means that your brain is constantly telling you things like eat all the food.
You can eat, eat all the sugary sweets you can eat or the processed food. It’s so good. It’s so rewarding. Look for pleasurable things that give you a dopamine hit to feel better instantly like that sugar or scroll on your phone or see how many likes you got on your latest social media posts. And your brain’s telling you to take a rest, take a break, do it tomorrow, do it next week or do it not at all give up. So if you’ve been struggling because it seems so much more enticing to have a snack and take a break and scroll on your phone rather than send that email about your price increases or posts that event and face rejection or confusion or doubt. This is not because something’s gone wrong with you. It’s not because you’re lazy. It is because your brain is functioning perfectly as it’s wired to do.
Isn’t that crazy? I remember when I first learned that it just explained everything. Our brains are wired to function that way. But if you want to create a successful life, successful home successful business, you’ve got to learn how to manage that part of your brain so that you’re not constant Lee giving into this motive, triad of seeking pleasure, avoiding pain and preserving energy. So although your survival part of your brain is operating normally when it motivates you to do these three things in today’s world, those things are actually working against us because today our world is so easy to survive in, but our brains still work. Like it’s not, we don’t know need our brain constantly telling us to go find food because food is everywhere, but still the messages sense. And instead of surviving, survival is actually so easy today in our environment that it ends up that we’re not achieving the things we want to do.
So if you couldn’t figure out, why am I stuck? Just do it in the same thing day after day. Why am I not going after my dreams? Why am I not becoming more disciplined or calm or organized or fulfilled? It’s just because you’re succumbing to that part of your brain and our reality today, running a successful life and business is actually the exact opposite of all these messages. Your brain is driving you to do. It’s driving you to find immediate pleasure for example, but in order to live a fulfilled life in order to create a business, you have to learn how to put off pleasure and guaranteed, starting and running a business does not provide immediate pleasure. As a matter of fact, it provides immediate pain. The pleasure having a successful business can take a years to get to. It’s going to be a ton of hard work.
Lot of stress, emotionally, physically, mentally stress in every way. So you gotta be willing to go against what your brain is wired to tell you no, that pleasure we’ll cut years from now, possibly or in other ways, but not from your business at first. And number two, starting and running a business brings up a lot of pain in the form of discomfort. Like I said, also physically, emotionally and mentally. It is difficult because you’ve taken up this hard challenge, even things you don’t think of as hard such as when you are running a business, you’re often going to be faced with making decisions daily. But do you know that your brain sees decision-making as hard work? So if you don’t learn to manage your brain, you’ll give in to this constant message of this is too hard and you’ll sit and confused, which doesn’t get you anywhere.
And your brain is okay with you sitting in confusion because it sees decision making is hard work. So confusion is kind of a rest for your brain. So it’s not productive. It’s not getting you anywhere, but your thinks it’s okay because it gives you a little rest. You don’t have to make a decision. And lastly, part three of the motivational triad since starting and running, creating a business is the opposite of being efficient because everything is new and cumbersome and you have to learn it and you have to try to learn new things and you have to fail. It requires lots of brain energy. Your brain is just screaming at you not to expend the energy. Remember it wants you to preserve your energy for your survival. So therefore if you decide, or when you decide to Uplevel your life, perhaps, so it’s more fulfilling or more balanced or you decide to start a business, or maybe you already have a business, but it’s not profitable yet or not as profitable as you want.
What’s going to happen is the survival part of your brain sees this as a dangerous threat to your survival because you’re going to expend lots of energy. You’re going to experience tons of pain through doing hard things every day, that aren’t any fun or they’re downright terrible. And it will go on for years. So just know when you decide to take on any of these new things, [inaudible] in life, your brain is going to tell you day in and day out, not to do it. And that’s okay. It’s all normal. It’s what you have to go through to Uplevel your life or your business. What you’re going to have to do though, is learn how to manage that part of your brain. That’s constantly telling you to shut things down. It’s too hard. Okay? You’re going to have to learn to manage it and live with it and know that it is going to come up.
It is going to happen. That’s going to tell you, this is too hard. You should just give up. And the clients I work with who achieve huge success in their life and their business, which means it’s fulfilling to not just profitable, but huge success without fulfillment is not really success. People end up making themselves sick. Those who do achieve success yes, and fulfilling lives. They know that something being hard and painful is never a reason to quit our work. When I work with clients, it’s hard work. We work so hard in our coaching sessions so that they can learn to manage that part of their brain. That wants to see all the logical reasons to give up. And there, they learn how to be able to keep going. Believing success is on the other side of all that pain. And it’s not immediate. It’s going to take time.
So now let’s talk about what’s going to happen when you decide to, to incorporate some changes in your life or create a business or grow your business. Here’s what I can promise you will happen. You’ll be faced with lot of new experiences every day, which of course freaks out this part of your brain because all these new things are inefficient. And remember in your, this part of your brain, that’s wired for survival. It hates inefficiency. Doesn’t like inefficient things. It wants everything to be habitual and put on autopilot and new things are not yet on autopilot. You got to create new habits, habits, new ways of thinking. So that part of your brain sees it as a threat. And you’ll have a huge hurdle to get over just to be able to manage this part of your brain, but something you gotta do. If you want to grow and build your business.
Now, when you are up leveling your life, creating a business, expanding your business, you will be faced with lots of failures and failure. I like to call failure is just feedback. It’s just feedback that this way didn’t work exactly right. And we need to do it a new way, but our brain sees failure. If you haven’t learned to manage your mind as something that is very painful. So when you fail it screams at you to stop. Not only that you probably beat yourself up. If you fail, because you start this, self-sabotaging talk, thinking failure because a part of your brain sees failure as certain death. So it’s not logical. Of course it’s not logical, but it’s all you know. So you’re getting all these messages, Oh, you failed. You didn’t make as many sales this week, as you had thought. So therefore you better give up this isn’t for you.
Or people will complain about your price. And you think you shouldn’t have increased your price. See you’re not doing it right. These are messages that are going on inside your head because you haven’t learned how to manage that part of your brain. That’s acting totally normally, alright, these failures can be small failures. Like maybe you didn’t get very many likes on your latest social media posts, or they can be huge failures. Like you lose a crop or you lose an animal or animals or someone complains about the CSA and wants their money back. Or you accidentally burned down a building. Seriously. This part of your brain experiences, all failure, threat of failure as life threatening. And again, if you don’t learn to manage it, you’ll not be able to reach your goals and your dreams because you’ll be giving into these messages of it’s not working like you want.
So you better quit give up. Now, if you saw my recent coaching call with April, that was episode 35. She was fighting with her brain, her brain to create structure because she knew logically that she needed more structure to get more things done in her day. But during our session, she came, when I was coaching her, she learned how to do that with ease instead of the battle she had been having in her mind, which led her to not having any structure very much at all. So if you watch that session, episode 35 you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. She started out thinking that creating structure was hard. It was impossible. It wasn’t working. She was failing. And with lots of thoughts, like, you know, telling her it’s the last thing she wanted to do in that session. You see her build the skill right in front of you being coached to a point of being able to create structure with ease and 10 X, her productivity, you guys, I see this every day with people I’m coaching.
Once they learn how to manage this part of your, their brain. Now, one more thing you’ll be faced with when you decide to do this kind of work in your business or your life is a lot of confusion. I read about this almost every day and the Facebook group, I get emails, messages. A lot of people are saying, I don’t know how, or I don’t understand how to do this, or I don’t see how this will work. That will also be a constant message when you start something new. So you need to learn how to manage that so that you’re not exhausted because confusion thinking you don’t know how to do something is exhausting. And you’re going to need endless energy to deal with these challenges you’ve taken on in life, which means you will need to learn to be very decisive and not allow yourself to indulge in confusion.
Confusion. Doesn’t move you ahead. Confusion is what I call an indulgent emotion. Your brain thinks it’s real. It thinks it’s important, but it’s not. You actually never need to choose to be confused because you’re not really confused. You’re just not making a decision. You’re indulging in confusion, taking a little break, mentally not making a decision means you haven’t decided to go do something. That’s going to take some work or some focus. So being confused as your brain’s way of telling you to stop and to quit and to make things easier. Remember it wants life to be a, not require energy. So confusion is something you’re going to want to learn to overcome and not sit in it in the future. And two more things you’ll be faced with when you decided to Uplevel your life or business here, you’re going to have to deal with a ton of rejection.
And I can tell you this. I promise you this, the bigger you get, the bigger the rejection gets to and the more it comes. So if you’re small now a small business, you want to look at that as a good thing, because your rejection is a lot smaller. And it actually is what builds you up to be able to handle the big rejections. So you don’t want use rejection by others as a reason to think you’re not doing it right, or you should give up rejection, doesn’t go away. Like I said, it gets bigger. And of course your brain sees this as dangerous and life threatening. So learning how to manage that, to just know that the rejection is there and it is a normal part of upleveling, your life is something you’re going to want to develop. We’re not born knowing how to deal with rejection because our brain thinks that rejection is life threatening because we need to be part of a community.
We need to be connected so that we survive and rejection means we’re not acceptable. And our life is at stake. And to rejection can be a feeling that you get. When you look again at a social media post, cause I hear this a lot that just wasn’t as successful. You didn’t get as many likes as you thought didn’t make any sales from it. And you feel that immense feeling of rejection. That’s your brain functioning. Normally it’s our brains are this, uh, survival part of our brain is kind of like a software program. That’s outdated, but it’s still working on overtime. And the update to that software program is exactly what I’m teaching here. You’ve got to learn to manage it with your decision making part of your brain, your cortex, which means if you want a more successful, fulfilling life, you’ll need to move to a place where you don’t try to avoid rejection.
Okay? And I know that’s really hard, but you’re going to want to learn to embrace rejection. You will know that the worst, the rejection is the more you’re actually growing. So you’ll want to learn to be open to rejection because it’s a normal part of improving your life and improving your business. Okay? Lastly, when you set out to create a business or improve your sales or build more profit or do anything new in life, you’re going to be filled with fear and doubt. And most people think something’s wrong when they have so much fear and doubt about new things, but it’s actually part of the process. So again, you’re going to have to decide to embrace fear and doubt and manage it. Otherwise you’ll just give up. And a lot of people think that being filled with so much doubt and fear means that they’re doing it wrong, but get this.
It means you’re doing it right. Then what happens is when they feel the fear and doubt, most people try to get rid of it or resist it, bury it, which means whenever you bury an emotion, like fear and doubt, it’s only going to grow bigger. It’s going to keep coming back. So I’ve talked about this before on the podcast, any Mo emotion you resist just stays with you. It gets bigger and worse. So if you’re wondering why you wake up with doubt and then every night you still go to bed with doubt and a little bit of hard work makes it dissipate for a little bit. Chances are you’re resisting it instead of welcoming it as a welcome part of the process, maybe you’ve heard me talk about how 50% of our life is most likely going to be some negative emotion and negative emotion.
50% of the time is not a bad thing. I want you to know this. It is a part of being human. It’s the human experience at 50% of your life will be negative. The challenge that we have, the problem we have is we’ve been sold this line of goods in our society that we’re supposed to be happy all the time. You see it everywhere. If you’re not happy, just turn on TV and you can take whatever pill of the week is on there or eat whatever food or do whatever thing or buy whatever the latest spanks are that will make you happier. For sure. So we’re sold this message that we’re supposed to seek happiness. Once you’ve learned to accept that life is 50, 50, 50% happy, 50% negative emotions. Wow. Then you realize that, Oh, fear and doubt confusion. Rejection are just part of the 50% negative.
Then what happens is you become more willing to put yourself out there and be okay with the discomfort of it. All. You find that you’re more willing to go after your dreams because 50% negative is just a fact. And you know that the positive is always on the other side of it. And it’s so fulfilling when you become willing to experience a 50, 50 of life. Now, some people, well, a lot of people struggle because they come to me and say, I don’t think this’ll work. I feel a lot of doubt because I’ve never done this before. They’ll say, and then they’ll think that if you’ve never done something before I, I tell you, of course, you’re going to doubt that you’re not able to do it properly. So again, it’s a normal function of your brain that you doubt it. But what I want to share with you is you will want to learn to shift your focus off the fact that you’ve never done it before.
But to the future, you want to shift your focus to the future. And what I call this as borrowing success from my future. So maybe I say something like, I’m figuring this out. I’m learning how to do this. Instead of saying, Oh, I can’t do this. Cause it’s never worked in the past. I tell myself, I’m learning how to do this. Right? I will get this right. It doesn’t matter that I’ve never done it right before or never done it before. I’m figuring it out. And I’m going to do it. Even though I have no idea how it’s going to work out. And again, this is scary to talk this way to yourself for that survival part of your brain, it wants to send you messages like, Oh, that’s an unknown thing. The future’s unknown. All you have is your past. So it tells you to run from the future and stay really small.
This is what happens is you stay really small. You never reach your dreams because you only look for evidence from your past. If you can do something, then this is often a point where people give up. But what happens then is you’re out of integrity with yourself. You broke a commitment to yourself. So you’re actually reinforcing the behavior of quitting because you made a commitment to try something. You didn’t learn how to manage your mindset around it. So you think it’s easier to give up. Then what happens? You just reinforce this habit of giving up. All right? A lot of people come to me because they start things, but they don’t finish them. This is habitual behavior. It’s not a personality trait. None of these things are everything I’m talking about in here are learned skills. All right? Remember that successful people don’t have easier lives.
It’s just that we’ve learned how to embrace pain and confusion and rejection and overwhelm, even humiliation of it and do the thing. Anyway, maybe many people think these things like fear and doubt and rejection means they’re doing it wrong and there’s a right way. They should be doing it instead. But I promise you if those feelings come up, it’s because you’re doing it right. It’s feedback to you that you’re taking steps to build something or create something that you’ve never done before. So embrace the terrible feelings. Don’t try to squash them or run from them or think something’s wrong. It’s actually a really good thing that you’re feeling all those negative emotions, but it’s counter to how your brain is set up. It’s why you question it the way to counteract this though. The way through that river of misery, I call it when the going gets tough, the way to get through it is knowing that a fulfilling and sustainable life profitable business.
It’s on the other side of it and be able to hold on to that. And how you do that is you’ve got to have a very strong commitment to why you’re doing this. You got to know, why are you doing this no matter what happens, what is your big, why? Because journey we’re on of, you’re going to where you’re going to change your life. You could change your business or create a business, or maybe you need to raise your prices. Whatever it is you’ve set out to do this journey will bring you so many horrifying stop in your tracks. Things that will feel terrible. Someone will say no to you. A lot of people might say no to you. A lot of people will reject you. People will tell you it’s a bad idea. Or they’ll say, why are you doing this? Or they’ll say, who are you to do this thing?
Or tell you your prices are too high or guaranteed. You’ll make a mistake in your emails or your marketing or your social media. Yeah. Posts. Okay. And then you’ll be embarrassed. You’ll feel worthless. Like, Oh my gosh, I shouldn’t be doing this. I’m not cut out for this. This isn’t for me. I can guarantee you’re going to feel this way about half the time. And so then, then you’re like, well, who wants to sign up for that? Who wants to sign up for a life of feeling terrible rejection, 50% of the time. That’s what you have to learn to be able to do. If you want the most fulfilling life you can ever imagine having and mindset management makes it so much easier. It’s a matter of telling yourself, of course I’m feeling this terrible thing. And that’s okay. A thing that helps you to be able to do that is to know what is your big, why?
What is the thing that no matter what happens, you’re going to keep doing this. Then what happens is when you focus on your big, why nothing else matters? Those negative emotions don’t matter as much you can get through them. You can acknowledge them, except them feel them and move on with ease because you’re headed toward a much bigger why in your life. That’s what it takes. You’ve got to be committed to creating this business no matter what, if you don’t have that commitment and that big, why you won’t get there, if you have, I have a no matter what reason, none of those rejections or failures or confusion or doubt will ever stop you from achieving this goal. So know your big, why, what is your big, compelling reason for doing this? Alright, so to wrap up, learning to accept that the way your brain is motivated is working against you, but deciding to move ahead on your goals and your dreams anyway, is the most difficult work you will do in your life.
But the most fulfilling way to live. I promise you if you’re trying to create a business and a more fulfilling life, and you’re struggling with feeling doubt or confusion or rejection or failure, that’s okay. It’s actually a great thing means you’re doing it right? So sit down, take some time, decide your big why and sign up for a coaching call. This is the fastest and most thorough way for you to learn this skill. Let me help you learn how to manage your brain so that you can reach your goals and dreams with so much more ease and so much less stress. All right, you can always schedule a free session to help you decide on coaching. That’s it. Three cow marketing.com forward slash strategy. I would love to help you so much in today’s episode, you might want to re listen, because there are a lot of gems in here that will make your life so much easier. Like I said, it’s part one of a, several parts series. So let me help you make sure and ensure your business success. All right, you guys see you on a coaching call. Thanks. Bye bye. Thank you so much for tuning into today’s episode for more great resources, check out the profitable mindset.com. See you next time.